Just rambling…

My Bestie posted this on Facebook

Image may contain: text that says 'OUTRAGED by George Floyd's Death. Supports GOOD Cops. Me Does not CONDONE looting and rioting.'

And I agree with it…this is me…not only about these three topics but so much more…

And then my friend Stacey shared this by Creig Crippen:

Dearest Ones,

Everything is going to be okay. Remember that when things get tough or a storm comes, we will survive, we will persevere, we will heal, and we will grow. Storms come to test us, to teach us, to guide us, to carry us forward, to nudge us back to our true path, to expand our consciousness. And if you feel like crying, go ahead and cry. And if you feel angry or sad or frustrated or afraid—feel it all, experience it all. Don’t run, don’t pretend, don’t hide—feel, cleanse, experience, be. We are beautiful and brave and strong warriors, learning and growing through every experience. Trust the journey. We are exactly where we are supposed to be. Shine brightly, beautiful souls. Never lose faith, never give up. We are safe, we are strong, we are not alone, and we are loved. Together we rise–through love, with love, as love. We lift each other up. Emotions are the waves, love is the ocean. I promise you, we’ll be okay.

With love,
This Moment

And then I feel encouraged. I’ve been feeling restless the last few days. I’ve had major tummy issues, a headache that is just there and I’m tired…so friggin’ tired. I have spent the majority of the past two days sitting in my recliner crocheting or napping and being THANKFUL for a husband who picks up the slack when I just don’t have it in me. And I feel FRUSTRATED with myself that I feel lousy.

One minute I can be happy and content and the next I am down on myself because I ate 5 Oreo cookies…that is after drinking two 40 oz glasses of water…trying to get healthy and yet continuing to make stupid choices. What I eat and drink doesn’t hurt anyone but me but I am precious, I am a child of the King, I am loved and blessed beyond measure yet I continue to treat myself in such unhealthy ways. Doesn’t make sense to me.

I know that this Covid 19 has turned our lives upside down but it has also been a blessing for us…we are safe, we have a nice home to live in, we have plenty of groceries, we get paid well, the children we are taking care of are healthy and strong…not one of the nine adults or fourteen children here at the ranch have gotten sick and I have much to be thankful for and yet here I am feeling restless and anxious.

I feel like I am rambling and not saying anything.