Focusing on What’s Important

As I wrote the other day…life has been a struggle for me and like in days and years past I let my emotions control my actions…I had a counseling session scheduled for today BUT yesterday in the middle of my angst I cancelled it ~ DUH…now more than ever I really needed that time to get refocused and calm my spirit. I did have enough sense to schedule another appointment for next Tuesday…NO I will not be cancelling it!!! Telling myself that as much as you!!!

Yesterday morning I woke up at 4:07, struggled through the day with tears, worry, anxiety but I didn’t take a nap thinking it would help me to sleep better last night…well it didn’t…I was up numerous times and this morning I woke up at 4:22!! I laid in bed for about 15 minutes and then got up…made myself a bottle of water (taking thyroid medication can’t have anything to eat or drink but water for an hour), combed my hair, put on some earrings, made my way out to the living room. Putzed around until our night staff person left shortly after 6:00a. Cleaned off my desk, put some more pages in my planner and then opened my Bible and devotionals.

I don’t know why but I am
and yet you always meet me where I am…
and this morning was no different!!

I opened Pocket Prayers for Moms given to me by my bestie and this was the verse that was written….
along with this prayer
Heavenly Father, you are the Lord of all, the almighty God and the everlasting one. Be near to me when my family faces change. When nothing feels steady, it is hard on all of us. Give me strength and courage in times of transition. Allow my family to see YOU leading the way. May the rely on you, especially when they feel uncertain. I am so grateful that even when everything around us feels unstable, YOU are there. YOU are our rock. I thank you and praise you for that. In Christ’s name. Amen

Just WOW!!

This prayer says it all…all that I’m feeling and thinking…there is just so much uncertainty in today’s world yet GOD remains steadfast and consistent…the things this mama needs to be for her family…steadfast, consistent, loving, kind and caring. I need to remember to extend the grace that I am so willing to extend to others to myself and our kidlets.

So many changes are happening, transition is the name of the game…transition from kidlets going to school to being schooled at home, from fixing one meal a day to fixing two or three and then being reminded to accept the help that is being offered…our school district, like so many will provide breakfast and lunch for all our kidlets. At first I told the principal “no, we’ve got the meals covered” and then our boss reminding me that by allowing the school district to provide breakfast and lunch five days a week it will relieve me/us of some of the pressure and thinking needed to be done.

WOW…yesterday was the first day we took advantage of the school lunches and it was wonderful…no comments from the kids that they didn’t want such and such. They ate and cleaned up after themselves. It was a good thing. And we have breakfast for today: pop tarts, apple juice and milk. Easy for everyone!!!

As I continued with my time with the Lord, I wrote…
and then I got distracted by looking for something on Facebook
but it turned out to be just what I needed for me, for us today

As I posted on Facebook we don’t have any beer but that’s okay, I have my Coke Zero, I won’t make a coffee cake but I will make my pineapple angel food cake bars…topped with whip cream and since Tuesday is one of our “chore days” we will pass on the big chores for the day like cleaning the bathrooms (we have six in our house!!!) and vacuuming but the laundry will at least get washed and dried…maybe even folded and some school work will get done…and this mama’s goal will be to keep a soft tone…remember the

marshmallows…and I might even have some for a treat for the kidlets!

Thank you Lord for my time with you this morning, for the many reminders that have come my way today…even this one…

Let’s remember…today is in the Lord’s hand, HE is in control and though we may face some struggles we will get through this and through it all let’s remember to give

Words to Think About

“Chaos to Calmness”My phrase for 2020…My life seems to be filled with chaos so much of the timeWebster states chaos is “
My niece posted something on Facebook awhile back about leaving a positive word for 2020 beginning with the first letter of the person’s name reading/responding to the post.  I thought what  a great idea and shared it on my Facebook page.  Six friends responded with…

complete disorder and confusion” and some days it feels like confusion runs amok in our home…think about it…five people, coming from five very different backgrounds, trying to mold into one family.  Yes, two of us have been together for over 44 years but some days I know we look at each other and think “what the heck are you thinking?”  So how do we expect three little’s who come from a state of confusion to meld into our home without a lot of guidance, grace and mercy???

~ Devoted

~ Caring
~ Respect
~ Kindness
~ Tender
~ Loving

were the words given to me and I have been thinking about how to incorporate them into my phrase…
I want to move from Chaos to Calmness and can do that by being Devoted to where the Lord has planted me right now…so often when I get stressed I think “I can just leave…” but is that being devoted…no, it really isn’t.  And I think about a friend who on her wedding day she told me if it didn’t work out she would just get a divorce…she always had a foot out the door…and I do that too thinking “I can just leave” but that isn’t a good mindset to be in…so this week while we have been camping, resting and rejuvenating I have been working on my thinking process and taking the phrase “I can just leave” out of my mind and changing it to…for such a time as this, God has called me to devote my life to these little’s that He has entrusted in our care.
Caring…I need to take care of myself to be able to take care of these kidlets.  I learned that phrase “take care of me to be able to care for others” many years ago and some days I do better at it than others.  I want to be intentional in caring for myself, through bettering my health, my emotional and spiritual life so that I can be the best person, woman, wife, mom, grammy, friend that God designed me to be and to do that I must take care of me…all of me!!!
Respect…I must respect myself enough to love myself to be able to share and teach others to respect themselves and others…respecting myself includes setting limits/boundaries to not let others disrespect me either with their words or actions and respect for myself must begin with me.  The definition of Respect is: a feeling of deep admiration for someone or something elicited by their abilities, qualities, or achievements and so I to have a deep admiration (LOVE) for all the things I am and can do for me before I can do and have it for others.  I need to value who I am and not allow others to tarnish or hurt me to make themselves feel better.  Respecting myself is loving me for who I am and for who God made me to be!!!
Kindness and Tender…immediately I think of something Janice shared with me many years ago…I need to become soft, soft like a marshmallow.  For many years I kept a quart jar of marshmallows on my desk, it sort of looked like this
to remind me to be soft, kind and tender to myself and others.  I tend to be stern and harsh trying to get people or kidlets to do what I need or want them to do…I need to be remember 
loving to myself and to others,
 in loving I need to extend grace, 
and grace like Jesus extends to me over and over.
By remembering each of these words and utilizing their meaning in my every day I know that our home will be one of peace and calmness!!  So I pray, Lord  help me to keep these words in my sight as I wake each morning and try to do your will and follow your commandment to love one another!!!