Beginnings, Choices, community, Family, Love

Checking In ~

Opened my devotional notebook and this is what I found:

Oh how awesome is our God to meet me right where I am! Today will be the first day that Ron and I go out and Scouting Home Visits in the community. Am I nervous, you bet BUT God says He will be with me.

As of today I have
~ 5 consecutive mornings getting up before my alarm
~ have only had 1 soda (diet or zero) for the past 4 days AND that was with two long days of traveling. Last Saturday we drove to South Carolina to help some friends out and then Sunday we drove back to Bear Branch, KY!!
~ 4 consecutive nights of no snacking after going to bed! Even though last night as I walked towards the bedroom I thought about grabbing the bag of popcorn but then told myself “Ali, you are not hungry, you don’t need any popcorn.!”
YES I am feeling good about myself and the CHOICES I have made over the past 5 days!!!

I then opened my little Experiencing God Daily Devotional.

and my heart took a little lurch.
As many of you know, my younger sister, Joanie has refused to speak to me for over 6 years, since my older sister, Kathy passed away. I will be honest most days, I just bury my feelings and wishes that she would speak to me, heck I don’t even know THE WHY she won’t speak to me.

I have sent emails, tried calling, Ron has called her, we’ve sent letters and cards ~ all to no avail. Sad Really.

But this morning, God spoke to me ~ even though Joanie won’t speak to me
I CAN
~ love her unconditionally
~ pray for her, for God’s protection, for Him to soften her heart
~ not retaliate or speak badly about her
~ and I can pray for her!

I want to scream out “it’s hard to love someone who won’t even speak to me” But God whispered, but you can pray for her.

So as I continue this day with CHOICES, SELF-CONTROL and NO EXCUSES I begin my day asking God for protection for us as we travel around Leslie County, speaking with community members, loving on them as Jesus would have us love on them I can pray for my sister.

*********
What about you? What are you focusing on today?

Blogs, Devotional, Love

Setting My Priorities

I am the kind of person that has lists, lists of things to do, lists of projects I want to complete, lists of all the medications I/we take and even lists of chores that need to be completed! I also love to mark things off of my lists – it is a visual thing to show me I have not been a bump on a log all day long 😳.

I also use a paper day timer/calendar and it is full of lists. Lists of things that need to be done each day, things that need to be for the week and the month. I love to see things written down and crossed off.

One of my priorities, for lack of a better word is to spend time each day in the Word of God. I wish I could say I am successful at doing that every day but that’s just not true.

But this morning I did and it was good!!! I use a variety of different devotional tools along with my Bible. Today’s scriptures were from Experiencing God Daily Devotional (EGDD) and January Scriptures and Writing Prompts (JSWP) from PrayerfulPlanner.

This morning’s verses were Isaiah 6: 5-9 and 2 Corinthians 3:18

and

And I was reminded if I look at things through my mind, my eyes and my thoughts I take my focus off of God BUT by keeping my focus on God I see peace, blessings (physical, spiritual and emotional) as how God sees me and wants me to see the world.

The prompt from JSWP was to write a prayer of transformation ~ my prayer today is that as I busy myself with all the things on my list I want to keep my focus on the Lord and how He is always with me, even when I don’t feel his presence and to have God’s love that He shares so openly and willingly with me shared with those I come into contact with, whether that be in person, on the phone or through a post on Facebook or an email…Lord, allow your love for me flow through me to those I come into contact with. Amen.

As many of you know, one of the things I enjoy doing is writing and yes, writing, blogging, journaling are all on my lists ~ do I do it every day? No, but I want to. One of the tools I am trying to use this year is being a part of WordPress Bloganuary. Today’s prompt was to answer the question “How are you brave?”

When I first saw the prompt I thought “I am not brave.” But in reality I am brave in many ways…I don’t let physical stuff stop me from doing things ~ I am thinking of only having vision out of one eye. Oh there are lots of things I won’t do because I only have one eye like go water skiing or snow skiing ~ the fear is real I would lose my eye and it would be impossible to find! And at $5000 a pop, that’s too much money to risk. But I do things that I have been told I can’t do because I only have one eye ~ cross-stitch is one because you know I might poke my good eye out! I enjoy cross-stitching, it’s right up there with crocheting…I love to make things and give them away. And yes, I have scratched the lens on my left side of my glasses before with a needle and I have even superglued my eyeball though I don’t recommend either of those activities.

Another way I am brave but I don’t call it being brave ~ I call it sharing my testimony, my story of being abused, abuses in more ways than I can count and also being a verbally and physically abusive person in my past. Am I proud of that abuse ~ absolutely not! What I am proud of is that I have learned how to love myself (self-abuse is a big thing too), love those who God has placed in my life, learned to share with others that you don’t have to be abusive, that it is okay to be a loving and kind person. I have also learned that I don’t have to be in control all the time…for so many years of my life I thought I had to control those around me, to get them to meet my needs, to do my bidding. BUT in reality I have realized I can only control myself. I can only control what I say or do. It doesn’t mean I can’t share my desires and wants and needs but it does mean I can only control me.

I think I will always struggle with wanting to control things, it’s only human to want what I want, when I want it

BUT GOD
has shown me how to love myself,
how to love others,
know the difference between wants and needs

AND WITH GOD
I am whole,
I am loved,
I am loveable,
I am enough
and
I can love others
just as God loves me!

and most importantly

Devotional, Family, Friends, Love, Northwood Alliance Church

Memories!

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Memories, come and go and little things or big things trigger them…the past few weeks I have been reflecting on my memories with our home church Northwood Alliance Church, Blaine, WA.
Changes are one of the things that gives rise to memories and change is coming to NAC as Pastor Charles & Margaret prepare to retire from ministry there this coming Sunday.  I wish I could be there but it just didn’t work out…so I find myself sitting and thinking…
We first met Charles & Margaret when our sons, Jon, Jamie & Brandon played soccer together and Margaret being the school nurse and my working in the elementary and primary schools.
We first began attending Northwood in November 2001 after my dad passed away and the struggles and issues that arose at Birch Bay Bible Community Church happened.  I could bring up the negative but what good would that do?  So let’s just say, for the better of things, our marriage and relationships we moved on from BBBCC to Northwood and it was a good move for us.
Northwood is and has been my family for over 19 years.  And like most families we have had our great times, our good times and even some hard times but what family doesn’t share some hard times AND hard times allow us to grow and become stronger.
I was our church secretary for 7+ years and I remember when Ron and I left to go to work for the Carnival (Spring 2010) Charles put in the bulletin…”it’s not often one’s church secretary runs away with the local plumber to join a carnival!” 😍
My memories consist of family diners, Thanksgiving and cooking/serving a 48+lb turkey, Christmas Eve Candlelight services, potlucks and Bible studies, lots of hugs and even tears but through all the memories is woven
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LOVE
and my devotions this past week have also focused on love, loving one another, loving unconditionally, loving others and showing grace.
Memories of coming together when we were hurting over the loss of a special friends…specifically thinking of Dee and Jack Nixon…they showed so much love to me, my family, our boys and demonstrated how to love one another through the difficult times 
AND THEN
celebrating marriages:
Julie & James
Jon & Rayna
Elizabeth & Chris
and so many others…
I’m thankful for my Northwood family
and as they/us face this new change of selecting a new pastor to shepherd the Northwood clan
and as we encourage and celebrate Charles & Margaret
and our Northwood family grows and expands
I’m thankful that we can love from afar for those of us not living in Blaine right now.
I’m just thankful for my Northwood family!
Blessings to Charles & Margaret!!!